I have long been fascinated by the power of our body language and how it can affect what we have to say.
Studies suggest that the emotional impact when meeting somebody comes 55% from what we see (image and body language), 38% based on how you sound-tone and volume and our words take just 7%
This means that if your body language is not aligned and sending a message that aligned with your words, what you have to say might get lost. Conflict and misunderstanding can be created.
The part that I love the most about working with body language is how it helps us understand others through better communication. When we understand that others have a communication style, we can stop taking things so personally. As a result, we have less conflict and more flow in our conversations.
I am not talking about changing who you nor just mechanically mirroring the other person. I am talking about getting a deeper understanding of how perceptions are created so you can intentionally adjust your posture and body language to improve your chances of being really heard.
One of my clients who is a manager to a big team had this one team member she could not get through to no matter what she tried. And this situation was creating a lot of stress for her.
When we discussed the concepts I mentioned above in detail, she could understand why her team member was NOT responding to her attempts. To the contrary, she was upsetting her more and more. By working on understanding the other person and her communication style, my client was able to facilitate a productive conversation.
This is what she had to say:
'I learned to communicate better and understand the blocks the other person may be experiencing because of the way I was communicating. I learned that if you want to get your message across or engage someone it’s important to understand that it’s not one size fits all. We need to adapt our communication style to fit our audience. Once I made the changes following Alba's advice, my team member immediately started opening up to me and was more than happy to work through the issues she had been having with her work. I didn’t have to ask. She even wanted to engage in non-work related conversation, showing that she was comfortable with the communication that was occurring. I couldn't believe it'
Powerful isn't it? Yet so simple.
Wanting to increase your or your team's communications skills? Let's talk. Comment below and I will be in contact with you.
Make this week an amazing one!
Alba Gomez is an image and personal brand coach, keynote speaker, first impressions specialist and professional image consultant.
Born in Colombia and based in Australia, she travels nationally and internationally for speaking, executive coaching, consulting and training.
Alba works with individuals and small groups right through to large corporations. She brings her client’s image into line with their personal and professional roles, giving them the clarity and confidence to look and feel their best. Alba uses a unique, results-orientated approach, drawing on her 14 years of experience with systems and processes as an engineer.