I know I used to and A LOT! The worst part: I stopped being me for fear of judgment, of criticism.
From my experience talking to a lot of people about this topic (men, women, different ages, backgrounds and walks of life), we all do it at one point or another in our lives.
I've heard from people who have not said what they wanted to say, to others saying yes to things they wanted to say no to, to changing some of their core values to be accepted.
How bad is that? How and when did we get so driven by what others think of us that we disconnected from our essence?
And if you are thinking, I don't give a s... about what people think of me, well I might challenge you and dare to say I am sure you actually do.
The reason I say this is because I've seen it over and over again on my coaching sessions. The people who say that end up recognising they actually care more than they would have liked to accept. The more we reject something, the more that part might live within us.
No judgment here, I just want to get anew awareness around this ;)
Now, we women tend to be worse at this. Unfortunately, we were told to behave, be pretty and smile. Yikes! So we spend our lives editing who we are until the final version is a distant memory of who we were.
The 'news' is everybody is judging you anyway. Their opinion of you is none of your business. At least not to get you distracted from being YOU.
I did this for so many years, especially in my previous relationships. Disaster!!! I changed who I was in order to be loved... the final result: many heartbreaks and a divorce.
Looking back on those times I now see how my relationships could not thrive when I was not completely being ME. Worst of all I used to get really upset because I didn't feel accepted. Well, I was not accepting myself. You get what you give. So it's better to do and give what you want to get. People are only mirrors of and they come to teach you something.
The first step in developing a stand out personal brand is to become and act more like the real YOU. That is why I talk so much about getting to know you at a deeper level. And that is why this process is so freaking awesome and life-changing ;) The more you are at peace with your dark and bright side the more magnetic you become and the happier you live.
Ready to take yourself to the next level? Let's chat. Book a time here
Have a fantastic week.
Alba Gomez is an image and personal brand coach, keynote speaker, first impressions specialist and professional image consultant.
Born in Colombia and based in Australia, she travels nationally and internationally for speaking, executive coaching, consulting and training.
Alba works with individuals and small groups right through to large corporations. She brings her client’s image into line with their personal and professional roles, giving them the clarity and confidence to look and feel their best. Alba uses a unique, results-orientated approach, drawing on her 14 years of experience with systems and processes as an engineer.